Friday, July 22, 2022

Endings and Beginnings

 The waiting has ended. Today I am in Cleveland. Carl's funeral was on Friday 22 July 2022. The Vesper Wake was on Thursday afternoon from 3 PM to 8PM at St. Monica's in Garfield Hts. He died on Friday morning July 15. My previous blog expressed my shock and sadness. When I think that last summer we had spent a few days at the cottage and returned in the fall for another couple of days, the time went too fast for me to absorb all that has taken place. Fortunately, I was able to visit him the week before he died. He seemed more fragile than the last time I had seen him. However, it was a good visit. 

When I arrived that Wednesday evening, he had just finished dinner. I wheeled him to his room and we started talking as usual. A few minutes later Bob Burge (a retired priest) who had taken him to various meetings, arrived. We had known about about each other from Carl but had never met. The three of us had a lively conversation. I returned to Gettysburg on Thursday late morning. I visited with Carl that morning. We attended a funeral mass for a nun. After 47 years of friendship, we communed together for the first time. We respected our respective traditions. When he came to Gettysburg, he would attend St. James Lutheran Church with me on Saturday evenings and I would attend St. Francis Roman Catholic Church with him on Sunday mornings. On Thursday our brotherly routine changed when I shared the Peace and communed with Carl. To me, that was the capstone of our friendship. I left after the liturgy. We embrace in the lobby and as I went through the front doors, we waved at each other and I knew that would be the last time we would see each other on this side of life.

When I returned to Gettysburg, I immediately googled Bob's address and wrote to him. I shared with him my telephone number and address. I wanted him to call me when he learned of Carl's death. I had only met his nephew Jim one time about twenty plus years ago. I met a grand-niece only last summer at the cottage at Lake Cardinal. They would not have my telephone number to contact me. Bob did call to tell me about Carl's death; on the same day Carl's great-niece sent me a message on Facebook about Carl's death. The next day, I had a call from Carl's nephew informing me about the death as well. He asked me to give the grace at the repast  luncheon which I did. For me, it was such an honor to be asked.

I miss Carl but I know he is at peace with our God.


Saturday, March 26, 2022

Transitions in life

This evening I had a very difficult telephone conversation with a friend. He shared that today, 26 March 2022, he was now in hospice care. There is a problem with his aorta and he feels at his age there will not be an extensive lengthening of his life or quality of his life. Carl Uhler and I have been friends and colleagues since 1975 when I was called to Advent Lutheran Church in Cleveland, OH. He was the priest/pastor at St. Henry Roman Catholic Church. Both were in the Lee-Harvard area of the city. We were installed in our respective congregations within a week of each other. We were both in the Lee-Harvard-Miles ministerium and the Harvard Community Service Board. We became good friends. When we both had the same day off, we would go to his family cottage on Lake Cardinal in Rome, OH.  He had gone there since he was a teen-ager with his family. Carl is 91years old so that site had been in his life a long time. My visits continued to Lake Cardinal when I moved to Gettysburg. I would spend a few days each summer. In fact, very often I worked on articles or my Payne book while there. In the summer and fall Carl would come to Gettysburg. We traveled the Gettysburg and other nearby Civil War sites, museums in DC, etc. During my first sabbatical when I was doing research at the Bibliothèque Nationale in Paris, Carl came over to visit for a week and we walked the Paris streets and visited a number of museums and tourist sites. During our conversation this evening we talked about all of our adventures. They are good memories.

I must also say that although we were good friends, we had our differences. We had very heated theological discussions or should I say arguments. These "discussion" ranged from social issues to pastoral authority. Even though we each held strong theological positions, they were not friendship dividing. Carl was helpful to me in developing contemplative/spiritual life. He took time to read and reflect. The Breviary was his companion.

In our conversation this evening, Carl reminded me that we don't know how long the hospice process will be. We'll continue to talk. I write this blog to help me adjust to Carl's news. 


 

Thursday, February 10, 2022

Second Anniversary

It has been two years (February 10, 2020) since my kidney transplant at the University of Maryland Medical Center. In fact, as I write this note, I would have been in the operating room at this time (9:53 PM).I am so thankful to the gentleman who was generous in giving his kidney. I might have said previously that I do not know his identity but I did send a letter addressed to his family through the organization that handles correspondence between transplant recipients and the donor's family. I still have to be careful about infections so I am extra careful being in large groups. I continue to think about all the hospital staff who assisted me during my stay and during the post-operative follow-ups. I recall them all, from the cleaning to the professional medical staff. God's creative work continues to confound me and to God I give thanks on this anniversary.

Thursday, January 27, 2022

Hunter College Memories

 Two week ago, Jeanne Lamont, a friend from college died from cancer. She was a medical doctor. I kept up with her career through Pat Pasqual who was also at Hunter and who had known Jeanne from high school. The last time I spoke with her was during her trip east when she visited Pat. Although I couldn't meet with her at that time, we did chat on the telephone. Her death made me recall the close friendships that I developed while a student at Hunter College of the City University of New York. I haven't seen many of those friends since my Hunter years, we continue to be in touch through each other.

I can remember Friday afternoons when  I would walk over to Roosevelt House on East 65th street. We would meet there to chat, catch up on the latest in your lives, and eat dinner. Sometimes, we would have a speaker come and talk about a topic of interest to us. It was a relaxing time. Through our times at Roosevelt House or during winter break in Connecticut the friendships w5ere nurtured and grew.

The City University of New York is a gem in higher education in the United States. Hunter prepared me for engagement in the world in my professional life. I am grateful. Hunter has structurally changed since I graduated from there in 1969 but I still feel connected to it after over 50 years.

Wednesday, January 19, 2022

Filling the Medical Gap

So much has happened since the last time I posted, I don't know where to start. The time since my kidney transplant on February 10, 2020 which I described previously. At that time the doctors noticed the spot on my upper lung. I told them that I knew it was there and that it was examined by  Wellspan in 2016 and a couple of years afterward and they didn't notice a change in size. UMMC doctors said that it should be watched which they did. I was referred to Dr. Britten who examined me and had me take more recent x-rays. I did that at the middle of January 2021. I received a call from Dr. Britt who said he read the x-ray and he saw something that he thought his colleague Dr. Burroughs would be better to look at. He said that I would receive a call from Burrough's office for an appointment. I saw Dr. B on April 9.

The appointment seemed strange and frightening to me. He was very methodical in his examination of the x-rays. He talked about the different types of cancers. As soon as he mentioned the "C" word my mind wondered. I didn't think this was a meeting concerning cancer. He did say lung cancer is a slow moving cancer. He wouldn't know what my spot could be unless he operated. He also said there were three possiblilities: Not do anything; do a biopsy which would not be conclusive; have the surgery.


I want you to know that I had surgery on Thursday, 22 July at the University of Maryland Medical Center. For the past 6 years, my x-rays showed a spot on my right lung.over a two year period it had not grown. Following my transplant surgery, they indicated that it should be watched for any changes. When I took x-rays at the beginning of year, the doctors noticed that there was a change in size. They could not tell whether it was an infection or cancer.  There were several  options  suggested  and I chose to have the operation and get a definitive  answer. I had the operation on Thursday. The pathology department reported that the spot was cancerous and the surgeon had to remove the upper right lobe of the right lung.which contained the cyst. The surgeon did not see any other suspicious  spots. I will be here a few more days before I return to Gettysburg. In general, the surgeon is pleased with the outcome.

I did not share my medical issue with too many people not knowing what the outcome would be. I am pleased with the outcome.

I am thankful to God who continues to preserve, protect and provide for the creation.

In Peace,
Nelson

Wednesday, October 28, 2020

Rest in Peace ! Requiescet in pace!

As I get older, the more I think of the people I met on my life journey. As we approach All Saints Day, I recall those who have recently died: Charles Jackson, Rev. Dr. Timothy Waltonen, and as of this evening Rev. Dr. Cheryl Stewart-Pero.

+ Rest in Peace! Requiescet in pace!

Friday, October 16, 2020

Trying to Catch Up

Time goes quickly. I did not realize that I had not posted anything since the spring (2019). The winter has been mild. I had no difficulties traveling during the Thanksgiving and Christmas seasons. I was able to attend the exhibitions at the Brooklyn Museum. The exhibitions were good but just being in the museum where I ventured as a child brought good memories.

Last spring I was notified that I was part of a list of kidney patients who might be able to have a kidney transplant in 6 months to a year. I attended the meeting at the end of March. In June I received a call. There was a kidney that was available and it looked like a good match. I was not able to use it because I had a tooth infection which was part of the pre-operative work. No transplant operation when one has an infection. Another call came a few months later. The nurse said it looked good on paper but they wouldn't be able to tell until they examined it in the lab. That call came through on a Monday afternoon. The next morning (Tuesday) I received a call. The kidney was not a good match as they had hoped. A third call came at about 2:45 in the morning. I was on the PD machine. A kidney looked good. I would have to disconnect from the machine and call my support person (Eric Crump) and come to the University of Maryland Medical Center (UMMC). I hung up the phone and was getting ready to disconnect from the PD machine when I received a follow-up call from UMMC. The time-frame would not work. The nurse said that one day the call will be for me.

On February 10, 2020, I was in the lounge area of my primary physician (Dr. Miller) awaiting to see him for my regular visit. My cell phone rang and it was from the UMMC. The nurse said that there was a kidney available and looked like at a good match for me. I asked whether I could call her back as I was about to see my primary physician. She said yes. I then called Eric, who was in the seminary library. I told him what had transpired. he said he would be able to drive me to Baltimore but had to return immediately to Gettysburg for a meeting. I said that would work for me. When I saw Dr. Miller, I told him what had transpired. He said, "This is what we have been waiting for." He looked at my latest tests and said, it looked good from what he could see. I left the office and when I arrived home I called the nurse at UMMC. I was still in shock but asked "What do I do now?" She asked, "When can you get here? I said I'd call my support person and get back to her. Eric said he could leave at 2:45 PM. I related that to the nurse who gave me instructions as to the check-in process. I called my sister and brother-in-law in New York and told them the news. Eric dropped my off at the hospital at about 4:30 PM. I wasn't doing a lot of talking but was still numb. Could this really be happening? I went to the admissions desk. The staff person could see I was nervous. She said, "You have done what you can do, now let us do our work." That was so true. Her words helped to calm me down. I was escorted to the elevator...The preparation began, the change into hospital garb, blood work, etc. After a couple of hours, I was prepped and the nurses were ready to take me down. One nurse asked if I wanted prayer, I said, "yes." She prayed. I was astonished that she asked me the question and really surprised when she prayed. The other nurse remained there. After the prayer was completed, I was prepared physically and spiritually for surgery. I was rolled to the surgery room at about 7:00 PM.

From what I could observe, I was the last person to leave the recovery room at about 2 PM (I has asked the staff person the time. If I remember correctly, it was about 2 AM when I returned to my room. There were lots of health persons who I saw in the post-op days. I have to admit, I had excellent care. From the non-professional to the professional staff. I was released on Saturday, 15 February. Jeanie and Robert were at my house when I received the word that I would be discharged. It just so happened that Bob Gahagen (the pastor at Epiphany Lutheran Church in Brooklyn, NY) and his wife Bertha were coming by to see me at the hospital. So, they came to visit and brought me home to Gettysburg on their way back to Brooklyn from spending time in Pittsburgh. It could not have worked out any better if we had planned it. Before being officially discharged, I had to demonstrate that I could count out and place the pills in the pill box....and there were LOTS of pills. I was given instructions for living at home. I could not be around large gatherings of people nor with people who had the flu/cold. Just a few weeks later, everyone in the U.S. had similar instructions due to the coronavirus. So, I was not alone.

My post-op routine has included: weekly blood work at Lab Corp in Taneytown, MD which is then sent to UMMC, periodic visits with my nephrologist, endocrinologist, pulmonary, my primary physician, etc. There are routine adjustments to my medications. I continue to isolate myself and certainly wear my mask when in public. 

In sum, I am so thankful for the transplant. I wrote a letter to the family of the person whose kidney I received. Although I was on the list for a transplant, I didn't think it would happen to me. God has been so gracious and continues to show power in our lives.